On my recent post about a difficult day of schooling that we recently faced, someone left a comment that at first I was like “WHAT?!” are people really thinking that, but then as I thought over it, it helped me look deeper.
“I'm sure some people were thinking ‘what's the big deal over the number 6’. Especially when there are so many things troubling others.”
I know that number 6 isn’t a huge deal in the grand scheme of things. It doesn’t even measure up to anything in this world that could be categorized as a tragedy or something to be really upset about.
I want to clarify.
It wasn’t the learning of the number 6 that I was concerned about. It was the fact that as a momma I have my children’s best interest at heart. It is heart breaking to watch your child struggle every moment of every day, just trying to reach into the recesses of his/her mind to find the answer to what the letter “h” says or what number comes after 6 when that question has been placed before them literally a hundred times before.
It also has to do with the fact that learning disabilities are just plain old HARD! Our days can be so difficult and honestly they are building some really strong character traits in me!
My momma’s heart wonders about the future. What will it look like for my boy who struggles to sound out words in his third grade reader? Will he be able to get a job that will support his future family?
And yes I know…”Be anxious for nothing…”. I try, I really do! I am doing much better with that then I used to. I know that God has plans for my bright young son, great and mighty and wonderful plans. Yet on that day the sorrow for my children and the difficulty of teaching them swept over me. I did not feel up to the task. At that moment I felt undone.
I know it wasn’t a tragedy. I know it wasn’t catastrophic. I know it wasn’t terminal. But, it was my moment. My mommy moment of sorrow.
In this world we often downplay others struggles and trials because they aren’t HUGE. I know, I am guilty of this at times. That comment on my blog was not meant to hurt me it was just an honest thought and honestly it was SO GOOD for me to read that.
How often have I overlooked or dissed others struggles? Too many times, I know. What they are going through at that moment may be big to them. It is there moment of struggle or sorrow and who am I to judge?
So, although the number “6” isn’t a huge deal in other people’s worlds it is in ours. Learning disabilities are difficult and frustrating for my children. It makes for tears and repeated feelings of defeat.
But I know that God doesn’t make mistakes. My children are beautifully and wonderfully made. This dyslexia thing, it makes them who they are. They see things in ways I never could. They are Creative, Funny, Imaginative, Energetic, all good and wonderful things.
God has a plan, I know! In this little section of this little moment His plan was to teach me that it’s okay to be sorrowful about 6 for a moment, but I need to remember God is bigger. And to remind me not to judge, but to see others through Jesus’ eyes, because He loves us all so mightily!