Friday, May 29, 2009

I Am


I am a mom who gets lonely. I miss deep meaningful conversations with other moms. I long for time to talk with other ladies. I ache for a couple of hours to just laugh and connect.

I am a mom who sits next to her young son, rubbing his head, holding a cold washcloth on the back of his neck, as he lays sprawled out across the cool, hard linoleum of the bathroom floor.  He moans and I pray as he tries to find relief from a migraine. 

I am a mom who struggles with selfishness. I want "me" time. I want to do and be what I want to do and be. I get tired of being pestered with questions and fights and ouchies.

I am a mom who cherishes snuggles and kisses. I love to feel chubby hands on my cheeks. I treasure the conversations, questions and learning. I store up in my heart the giggles and smiles. And I hope I never forget the look of utter trust in my children's eyes.

I am a mom who fights feelings of guilt. I sent my son to bed with a sore throat and stuffy nose and didn't take the time to rub his head as he drifted off to sleep. I rushed through the day not taking time to listen carefully to the story my little one wanted to share. I spoke sharply to my children because I was irritated with their behavior.

I am a mom who loves to care for my children. I am grateful that I am able to feed them body and soul.  I appreciate my full days cleaning, cooking and teaching. Their dependency on me is is fulfilling.

I am a mom who tires from the constant requirements of motherhood. The cleaning and feeding and refereeing can feel all consuming. The needs and wants loom before me like an unclimbable mountain

I am a mom who feels greatly. Happy and sad. Angry and content. Compassion and irritation. Wonderment and befuddlement. Guilt and success. But most of all I am a mom who adores!


  1. me too!! ;)
    I think a lot of mothers can relate to this post...I hope!

    can't wait to see your skirt- that is just awesome! I have my eye on a few 'SO' immodest dresses at Kohl's that I want to cut up and repurpose...I love the fabric on there....but those triangular padded tops GOTTA GO!

    have a great weekend!!

  2. what a wonderfully written true.
    i just went running to have some alone time. we all need it to be better mothers.
    i wish you lived close...i am part of such a wonderful homeschooling group.
    have a great night and a wonderful weekend.

  3. What a lovely post, I can most certainly relate! I often feel guilty for my failed mommy moments, sigh how I wish to be like the ever-so-patient mommies from my son's beloved cartoon shows. But you know what, we're not actors nor cartoons. We're real mommies, flawed or not, we love our children unconditionally and I know the feeling is mutual :)

    Beautiful post!!

  4. oh, what a great post! you write so well.

    and get over to this side of the state and have some "connecting" time with this mom!! ha

  5. I REALLLLY Like this! Did I say Really. I can really identify too-even with only my one boy! I am sure you are an amazing super mom and friend!

  6. Well said, Jenn! It's hard to be a mom. It's hard to give up the things we find fulfilling outside of being a mom, but I know they will be gone all too soon. Bottom line: Your kids know you love them deeply- even when you mess up. You are a great mom!

  7. Two thumbs up * Clap, Clap * Hear, Hear * Good stuff, Jenn.

    You and I are with our children nearly 24 hours of every day. So, I totally understand these feelings.

  8. I think we all get these feelings from time to time. The more honest we are, the better chance we have of letting the Holy Spirit help us to be better and say "I am patient" more than we say "I am fed up". It's a long road, but if we were all perfect, why did Jesus die on the cross for us?! Thanks for your post. I well!

  9. I'm SO glad you wrote this and shared it with us!
    It's the intentional choices we make everyday that help us grow. I loved reading this, thank you!

  10. I know that being a mother is really hard work!! It is the hardest yet BEST job ever. I know that it can be hard and I think we do need a little bit of mom quiet time to be refreshed by God!!

    One of the reasons I love blogland is that it does help encourage moms!

    I hope you are having a wonderful weekend!

  11. I am...impressed you captured all that is in a mom's heart so well.
    I am so sick of laundry and cleaning up...but I love that I am even able to say that at all and I have a family to do it for~

  12. Well said! Beautiful post that I can definitely relate to. Thank you!

  13. You expressed the life of many a momma - including me. Thank you!

    I am trying to learn the balance of treasuring my children and still being a person - not just a mom.

    Thank you for your wonderful post!

  14. I think that describes every mom who has ever loved her children!! Beautiful post:)

  15. Hi there, I noticed that you became of follower of She Looketh Well and I wanted to welcome you. So, welcome ;-)!

    I got distracted by reading some of your posts and they are beautiful! This really spoke to me. Thanks for sharing your heart!

    Amazed by His Grace,


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