Friday, November 20, 2009

Mr. Goggins

"UH, mom, we got problems back here. Mr Goggins spilled pop on my lovey." (Said by Lauren as we were traveling and pop mysteriously appeared on her favorite blanket.)


Mr Goggins,

We are a welcoming, warm family and quite happy to have house guests under normal circumstances. However I must confess your visits are far from easy and enjoyable. Since you are a cute, purple, tiny mouse, people may wonder what the problem is, but as you well know looks can be deceiving.

When Lauren first introduced us to you we were all caught up in your adorableness, but time soon changed our opinion. You may be cute, tiny, fuzzy and best of all purple, but you are also mischievous, sneaky and a trouble maker.

If a drink gets spilled you are the culprit. It a mess is made you have made it. If food disappears, you have devoured it. You, Mr. Goggins are synonymous with disaster, destruction and gluttony.

Oh, I have tried to be patient. I have tried to pleasant. I have played the part of a gracious hostess. But, enough is enough.

You come into my house and eat everything in sight. You spill, toss, and scatter. You cause all sorts of catastrophes. Never an apology escapes you tiny mouse lips. As a matter of fact you never utter a word. I have heard it said you can't talk. That sir, is extremely far fetched.

The time has come for an ultimatum. Here are my terms:

  • No more flinging of food, toys, drinks or paper
  • No more breaking of toys
  • No more scattering of my collection of buttons
  • No more making of nests in my children's loveys
  • No more incessant eating and scratching

Please consider these carefully. If you feel you can't comply with my wishes then please pack your tiny mouse bags and vacate.

If you feel that you can obey these rules then you are more than welcome to stay. Because, sir, at times you provide an amazing amount of entertainment.


~A mom in search of order, cleanliness, and the truth


  1. I cannot stop from laughing. I love your daughter - and, I don't even know her. So, this is really what 3 looks like? And, I thought I was the one with a HUGE imagination. I wonder what my littles will come the future, in this regard. They say, your children take after you(even you have it in you, Jenn, for such a post!)...Sometimes more, so. Oh, I (honestly) do look forward to it.

  2. Oh, that was so cute! Of course, since he is a mouse, these are natural instincts kicking, eh? LOL!
    The Girl in the Pink Dress

  3. Mr. Goggins must be a kissin' cousin to Not Me. I always said if I ever caught up with that little booger he was dead meat!

    I loved you sweet take on your ornery little crittter. Isn't the imagination a wonderfully entertaining thing?

    You and your lovely family have the best weekend!!!

    God bless :o)

  4. This is too funny! I didn't realize that Mr. Goggins was part of the family! I hope I meet him over Thanksgiving dinner. On his best behavior, of course!

  5. how firstborn at the same age had a friend named "mickey mouse"..until I read this I almost forgot about him..wonder what happened to him?
    Did I remove the welcome mat?
    You are a very nice host :)

  6. Well, it sounds like you got your point across. Feel better? Please follow up with us and tell us if he chose to stay or vacate. Perhaps, Lauren could let you know.

  7. Very cute. I love the imagination of children! In our family we have a "gentleman" named George that my grandpa introduced to us. He's always leaving lights on, toys and food on the floor, opening and closing doors, and generally creating mischief. I think maybe Mr. Goggins could be the George family (yes, I have come to the conclusion that George has many brothers, sisters, and cousins) pet. :-)

  8. Poor Mr. Goggins! I found him to be quite pleasant when he was over for tea and scones. Of course he doesn't live with me...


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