Monday, July 19, 2010

Lifting My Eyes

The past few weeks have kept me moving, but amongst all the chaos there was a lesson to be learned.

July 15, 2010

As much as I want to simplify and as much as I have talked about slowing down. I haven’t been able to. It’s still go, go, go and do and do some more, cross another thing off the list and continue to accomplish.

It’s catching up with me. Yesterday, I snapped and snarled at my kids. Several times.

After we got home from VBS last night Joel and I got into a disagreement. It was nothing major, but it left me in tears, just the same.

I’m not a runner. I’m a pacer. I like things at an even keel. These past couple of weeks have shaken up this momma’s nice tidy schedule.  I’m not persevering in this race to well.

With all the craziness and to-do’s I haven’t had much time for my children.  Yesterday, Lauren, received a new Candy Land game.  She was extremely excited to play it. She asked me multiple times to play with her.  I kept putting her off.  The game never got played.

The boys requested help with this and that. I struggled to find time to help. I felt frustration rise because they needed me so much.

As I laid down to sleep last night, I realized the toll this busyness it taking. I dislike it.  Immensely.

But what struck my heart the most, as I laid there with tears and discouragement, was that I have wandered away from the Lord. My mind, my heart and my soul have been preoccupied. I’ve been stumbling through on my own and doing a pretty sorry job of it.  I have been forgetting to “lift up my eyes to the hills from whence does my help come.”  The Lord is my help in times of busyness and in times of tranquility.

I can’t be the momma I want to be when I’m sprinting if I don’t fix my eyes and heart on Jesus.  He alone will give me the peace, patience and endurance required for the busyness. And when the days quiet again and I’m once more pacing at an enjoyable rate, He will give me the insight and wisdom I need to understand and learn from the days I spent racing around the track.


Looking forward to a slower day today, maybe.

I’ve already tutored my young student, while wrangling a stray dog who insisted on tearing up our turkeys.  I’m dealing with a bit of frustration.  We now have 11 stressed turkeys. One with a broken wing and one missing a chunk of flesh from its breast. I’m praying for patience. And also that our turkey’s won’t die from the stress.  My son has spent the last 45 minutes sweet talking them and offering them lots of water and lettuce from the garden.  He continues to sit with them. He is so concerned for their well being.

I’m continually lifting my eyes today and teaching my children to do the same amidst the angst and frustration.



  1. A common occurance with us moms right now, huh? I've been struggling with this as well and have, too, realized that my first problem is in neglecting my time with the Lord. I've gotten out of the habit of talking to Him all day. And I've suffered for it, as well as those in my family.
    Hang in there, and I will as well.

  2. I can relate so much. It a lesson I've been taught time and time again, but don't seem to learn to well. I always fail misserably when trying to live life in my own strength and ability...yet I continually go back to it. I'm thankful that God is more patient with me, than I am of myself or anyone else!

  3. I can completely understand & relate oh so much with you. I often feel overwhelmed & really have to try to slow down & take a deep breath, and remember that God never gives us more than we can handle.

  4. I'm in the same boat. I am pressing in though and I have found peace again in the midst of the chaos and storms. Now there is a lull that I am ever so grateful.

  5. So much is lost in the business. I'm not sure just what we have done to ourselves. Truly, I had more free time when the kids were growin' up than I do now that the kiddos are grown and I no longer teach in the classroom. I can't even imagine tryin' to survive today's world with growing children and a job to hold down on top of the farm. I will sure pray for you girls and that you can find balance to your very hectic lives.

    Ya'll have a beautiful summer day and take a minute to just breathe!

  6. I hear you, my friend.

    I can go through these same sorts of moments, that quickly turn into "daze".

    I'll be praying for you... as I already think of you often through-out my day.

    Psalm 3:3 ~ may He be the lifter of your head.

    My week is ramping up with craziness, we're planning to go on vacation next week. I'm right there with needing to keep my gaze on the Savior, and not on the shifting sands beneath my feet. Can't wait for vacation - but oh the stress of gettin' there.

    Your post is good reminder for me, too. thanks!

  7. Hang in there! Call me if you want to talk!

    So sorry to hear about the turkeys. I hope they are OK. And I hope your day did eventually slow down!

    Love you much!

  8. Jenn,
    Thanks for sharing your heart. Mine is right there with you. I, too, will lift up my eyes.

  9. Thinking of you today.
    I just know that tomorrow will be better!

  10. I understand, but its time to say no every demand outside your home. For the rest of the week just say: "I am sorry but I am unavailable." When your kids notice--there is a problem. If your getting angry with your husband because you have too much to do--there is a problem. STOP RUNNING!Spend time with the family they deserve YOU.

  11. I'm right there with you, my friend. We intend to slow down... I say, 'this summer' we will take it easy, or 'this next school year'... but, truthfully.... these little ones keep me running. It's hard to remain balanced in everything. I just had a conversation with my husband about that this morning.

    I enjoy catching up on your blog. :)

  12. Sistergirl, thanks for the advice. I am doing just that. We having nothing extra scheduled this week. And the prior weeks were actually things that I could not say no to. I would have if it were possible since I believe in keeping my house and life peaceful and non-hectic.

    Thanks for stopping by and leaving me a comment!

  13. OH Jenn...I will pray for you right now! How WONDERFUL that you see that your help can only come from HIM and HE is drawing you back! What a beautiful testimony and an encouragement to the rest of us! May the LORD help us each to take the time we need at HIS feet each and every day that we might bring GLORY to HIS name!

    Thank you for sharing you heart here is lovely!



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