I know, as a rule, I should keep my posts upbeat, but I also think a good dose of honesty is key for helping other mom's see past the facade. So with that said...
I am so tired.
I'm tired of cooking. I'm tired of cleaning. I'm tired of responsibilities. I'm tired of trying to keep it all together.
I'm worn out.
I want to sit and hear silence. I want to read a book and not feel guilty about it. I want children who behave like angels. I want a perfectly clean house.
I know it's not a great attitude to hold on to. It can only bring discontent and strife into my life and my family's. Yet, there are days when it just seems to grip me and steal my joy.
That's why I need strength. I need wisdom. I need patience. I need God.
When I face days where I feel devoid of all strength and desire to do what momma's do, I need my Savior. He alone can fill me up, adjust my attitude, strengthen me, and set me back on the path for another leg of this journey.
I cannot do this alone. There is too much required of me. If and when I try to tackle being a mom to my four children on my own, the results are always the same...exhaustion.
Psalm 62:5-6 says,
Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
I claim this verse and repeat it over and over. When I am weary, overloaded, stressed, angry or sad this verse supplies hope. I am not alone. God is with me even on the days when I am desiring to be anything but a momma.
When I take the time to focus on God and his strength, I find that I am less weary, more content and less likely to wish I had a different vocation!
God is the light I reach for on those dark days. How about you?